Home > Best Of, Food & Drink, Funny Ha-Ha

Pizza Hut’s “Hand-tossed Style Pizza”

Saturday, May 12th, 2007 | Best Of, Food & Drink, Funny Ha-Ha |

I drove by a Pizza Hut that had a sign advertising “Hand-tossed Style Pizza.”

I can’t decide where to begin making fun of that name.

Maybe I should strike a kung-fu pose and scream “I defeat choo now! I know you hand-tossed style!”

Or how about “I’ve never had style pizza, much less style pizza that was tossed by human hands.”

Then again they don’t say it’s hand-tossed by humans. Maybe it’s hand-tossed by monkeys. MY KUNG-FU STYLE IS MONKEY PAW!!!

I guess it isn’t really hand-tossed, hence the insertion of “style.” Pizza Hut is using three words to describe its pizza - hand, tossed, and style. The first two words tell you the pizza is hand-tossed. The third word tells you it isn’t.

An equally good name would be “Hand-tossed Pizza. NOT!!!” Or maybe “Hand-tossed Pizza. Wink-wink.” There are probably trademark issues around “I Can’t Believe It’s Not Hand-tossed Pizza!”

See also:
- Why can’t Starbucks sell “small,” “medium,” and “large” drinks? (everything2.com)

2 Comments to Pizza Hut’s “Hand-tossed Style Pizza”

Stormy Dragon
May 12, 2007

Contrary to popular belief, Starbucks’ smallest size is not the ‘tall’. They have a forth smaller size called a ’short’ which is only 8 ounces. They don’t put it on the menu because they get more profit on the larger drinks, but you can walk into any Starbucks and ask for one and they’ll make it for you.

The reason for the short is that a true cappacino shouldn’t be much more than 8 ounces or the foam collapses under its own weight, resulting in the sorta of sudsy dishwater stuff you get on the larger drinks.

triticale
May 13, 2007

I’ve never been in a Starbucks (I don’t drink coffee, it keeps me awake) but I’ve been places which offer soda only in large, extra large and jumbo. When I ask for a small soda, meaning their smallest size, and they can’t sell it to me, I walk out in a huff.

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