From the fine folks at McSweeney’s. It’s probably wrong that I think this is the funniest part:
(DAVID PEREL learns that JOHN EDWARDS is visiting RIELLE HUNTER at the Beverly Hills Hilton and sets up an ambush in the hotel. When JOHN EDWARDS sees them, he flees to the bathroom.)
Mr. Edwards, come out.
We live in a democracy.
Information is the tonic
That corrects hypocrisy.
Oh, of course, yes. I agree—uh,
It’s just that I have diarrhea.