Ridiculous Things About Sons of Anarchyť #2 – They commit crimes like they want people to Facebook the pictures
The bad boys on Sons of Anarchy are just too pretty to cover up their mugshots. Mostly they rob and murder in broad daylight wearing SAMCRO-branded lifestyle apparel and looking like they just stepped out of a lineup.
- In Season 1 Opie, Bobby and Jax go to murder the port commissioner in broad daylight without masks. His mistress sees them through the window and gives the police a description for a composite sketch of Opie and Bobby. Bobby goes to jail and faces the death penalty.
- In Season 2 Opie blows up a Nords meth lab without wearing a mask. He gets videotaped and Ethan Zobelle gives Deputy Hale a disk with the video.
- The same season the gang busts in on Zobelle’s gang to murder them all, again with no masks, only to find an audience full of families and a bank of video cameras. Off to jail they all go.
The only thing the gang has in their favor is that the police chief is totally in bed with them.
CHIEF UNSER: Did you see who killed all of these people?
WITNESS #1: Oh hell yes I did! They were riding Harley-Davidson motorcycles and wearing black leather Sons of Anarchy cuts.
WITNESS #2: There was a tall beefy one with a red beard and his hair tucked into a black knit cap.
WITNESS #3: Right, and one guy was fat with a huge salt and pepper beard. And he had white stitching on the armholes of his cut.
WITNESS #4: Yeah, and one of ‘em was a skinny Puerto Rican kid with a short mohawk and tattoos on both sides of his head.
CHIEF UNSER: Shit! Looks like I caught myself a stone cold whodunit.
Previously – Ridiculous Things About Sons of Anarchyť #1