Les Jones

Funny Ha-Ha > Local Knoxville Nobel Prize Winners

Most people don't know it, but Knoxville actually has its own Nobel Prize. You may already be a winner! Herewith the Local Nobel Prizes for Knoxville, Tennessee:

Economics - This year's Local Knoxville Nobel Prize in Economics goes to... The guy who figured out that you could calculate the waiter's tip by doubling the sales tax. This invention was almost rendered obsolete. A few more years of a Sundquist governorship and you wouldn't have had to double the tax.

Chemistry - The Local Knoxville Nobel Prize Van for Chemistry is heading to the house of... The guy who realized you could sprinkle salt on a napkin to keep your beer glass from sticking.

Medicine - Finally, the Local Knoxville Nobel Prize in Medicine goes to... The guy who was bitten by a grizzly bear and patched his wound with duct tape. Once the grizzly booboo was patched he hiked to his ATV, drove 15 miles to his pickup truck, and drove half an hour to the hospital. By the power invested in me by having a blog, I hereby make him an honorary Knoxvillian.

That's it for this year. If you didn't win, buy two tickets next time. And remember - you can't win if you don't play!